T O P
gwaaadit

I don't know a lot about rugby but I assume that guys job is to either flatten people or throw them through a hoop.


icaphoenix

In that order, actually


egordoniv

Plot twist: he's the field they play on.


Bef1234

flatten them


bigwinniestyle

He actually plays lock. So he gets lifted up high in the air during line outs by his teammates in order to try to catch the throw in.


educated-emu

First they need to be squashed into a ball.


bigdickpuncher

"... I am the brute squad."


onedarkhorsee

There is a lot of forced perspective going on here.


juanpuente

Still 6'8


Catfrogdog2

For reference John Key is 5’9”


Mentally_Ill_Goblin

Me too


80H-d

Is it really r/absoluteunits without someone crying forced perspective? Even though they're always correct, even you here today, just like, give it a rest sometimes yea?


Squarebearz

![gif](giphy|wvoP8WLDhn0MA2mQKr)


onedarkhorsee

Iv'e seen both these guys in person, so I guess I just commented from experience, I wasn't aware it was bad etiquette to state what I have seen. Sam is a big dude so he still absolutely belongs in this sub. Sorry I hurt your feelings


80H-d

Nah, it isn't bad etiquette, just tiring. You were magical customer number 100 if you will


onedarkhorsee

Ok, well genuinely no offence meant


JohnnyDarkside

I'm imagining a colossus and wolverine combo. They grab the ball and he throws them like a javelin.


ZeuxisOfHerakleia

flatten them, then use them as frisbee


darth_bald

That dude makes literally everyone else in his life look tiny.


Bunyep

He's probably not being cast in the next Tom Cruise movie


Snooklefloop

we're gonna need a shit load of milk crates for the fight scene close ups.


FelixTheHouseLeopard

I was so pissed off when they cast him as Jack Reacher


PM_me_yr_bonsai_tips

Are you implying Tom Cruise is not 6’5”?


icelandiccubicle20

6 ft 7.5 and 265 lb!


Techhead7890

Yep, even [Ritchie McCaw](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/proxy/2cdaSzk9pITLtXL439R-hPN6oVSto4P_FaheC0iMrnYNAiLdoHyvr6RjE9-zZYhXqcIgDBEWyIaimuQ-ApSDXOtRZO6zCm00sr3YiYjK8Q) sitting down watching them (to the left of the PM-in-the-suit) looks tiny in comparison, and at 6'2" McCaw is nothing to sniff at.


Tomatetoes97

*ex-primeminister


Luecleste

I was going to say, I thought the NZ PM was a woman…


Invader_Zyn

Jacinda Ardern


Luecleste

Yeah. Had a bit of a mind blank and couldn’t remember her name. Thank you.


peregrina9789

WHAT A BABE Edit: Jacinda Ardern = babe. Harry Styles = babe. Tammy Lahren = not babe. John Cena = babe. Hot jagoffs = not babe. Badass woman cracking political skulls for humanity = babe.


MrSexyPizza3

Milf to be exact


TheDukeOfDance

I think theyre still just called Prime Ministers Edit: different countries have different terms, former prime minister, past prime minister, etc.,


FriedGhoti

*sub-prime ministers.


TheDukeOfDance

optimus prime ministers


80H-d

Primal ministers


80H-d

Omg i was about to say prime "maxisters" but that would literally have evolved to "magister" which is already a thing


I_love_pillows

Prime rib roast minister


80H-d

Aha your so cannibal sweaty


Schnevets

Primes Minister


VacuouslyUntrue

There can only be one.... Its in the name.


80H-d

Usda prime minister, choice minister, select minister, standard minister, commercial minister, utility minister, cutter minister, and canner minister


TheDukeOfDance

I mean their title doesnt change to ex-Prime Minister when a new prime minister is elected


Madmaniac03

No it changes to former prime minister


TheDukeOfDance

Looks like this is true in several countries, although in the UK it looks like they call them past prime ministers. My bad!


maximuffin2

Post-Prime Ministers


errol_timo_malcom

For the Americans out there: Sam Whitelock- 6’8”, 258 lbs Lebron James - 6’9”, 248 lbs Shaq - 7’1”, 325-395 lbs


joepalms

Joe Rogan- 5’5


omxIs

Hitler- -6'


AggresiveDuckSlayer

I thought he's 9'?


Kalapuya

*5’8”


DooberDrivah

Tacko Fall- 7'6" 311 lbs


Iggins01

Did he put on weight? Dude was a two last I saw


DooberDrivah

He's been bulking up.


Iggins01

Good, he really needs it. His metabolism is at about the speed of light tho


zzaman

He was named for the duty he was burdened to carry


FC37

Zdeno Chara: 6'9" 250 lbs


FoulfrogBsc

Ben Shapiro 5'3"


Phelix_Felicitas

That explains **so much**


thebenshapirobot

I saw that you mentioned Ben Shapiro. In case some of you don't know, Ben Shapiro is a grifter and a hack. If you find anything he's said compelling, you should keep in mind he also says things like this: >There is no doubt that law enforcement should be heavily scrutinizing the membership and administration of mosques. ***** ^(I'm a bot. My purpose is to counteract online radicalization. You can summon me by tagging thebenshapirobot. Options: history, climate, feminism, dumb takes, etc.) [^More ^About ^Ben ](https://np.reddit.com/r/AuthoritarianMoment/wiki/index) ^| [^Feedback ^& ^Discussion: ^r/AuthoritarianMoment ](https://np.reddit.com/r/AuthoritarianMoment) ^| [^Opt ^Out ](https://np.reddit.com/r/AuthoritarianMoment/comments/olk6r2/click_here_to_optout_of_uthebenshapirobot/)


DakotaEE

Good bot


thebenshapirobot

Thank you for your logic and reason. ***** ^(I'm a bot. My purpose is to counteract online radicalization. You can summon me by tagging thebenshapirobot. Options: civil rights, feminism, history, sex, etc.) [^More ^About ^Ben ](https://np.reddit.com/r/AuthoritarianMoment/wiki/index) ^| [^Feedback ^& ^Discussion: ^r/AuthoritarianMoment ](https://np.reddit.com/r/AuthoritarianMoment) ^| [^Opt ^Out ](https://np.reddit.com/r/AuthoritarianMoment/comments/olk6r2/click_here_to_optout_of_uthebenshapirobot/)


BlueEyedGreySkies

Good bot


B0tRank

Thank you, BlueEyedGreySkies, for voting on thebenshapirobot. This bot wants to find the best and worst bots on Reddit. [You can view results here](https://botrank.pastimes.eu/). *** ^(Even if I don't reply to your comment, I'm still listening for votes. Check the webpage to see if your vote registered!)


thebenshapirobot

Thank you for your logic and reason. ***** ^(I'm a bot. My purpose is to counteract online radicalization. You can summon me by tagging thebenshapirobot. Options: dumb takes, civil rights, history, sex, etc.) [^More ^About ^Ben ](https://np.reddit.com/r/AuthoritarianMoment/wiki/index) ^| [^Feedback ^& ^Discussion: ^r/AuthoritarianMoment ](https://np.reddit.com/r/AuthoritarianMoment) ^| [^Opt ^Out ](https://np.reddit.com/r/AuthoritarianMoment/comments/olk6r2/click_here_to_optout_of_uthebenshapirobot/)


hugh_daddy

Good bot


thebenshapirobot

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TheLouisvilleRanger

Jordan Mailata - 6’9”, 346, Card carrying member of the International House of Pancakes.


errol_timo_malcom

Yeah, there are some big ol’ NFL players out there.


TheLouisvilleRanger

Yeah. There’s have been some 400+ lb guys. Though I feel like we won’t another one of those for awhile since athleticism is valued much more in those positions. Now your Offensive Tackles are some of your best athletes.


Tomatetoes97

John Key - 4"


redstone665

+ Ponytail


ej_DoLo

Me - 5.6"


FlyWtMe87

absolute unit.


AggieDev

Partial unit.


roostermongol

Eben Etzebeth - same height 268 lbs Lood de Jager - 6'9", 275 lbs


rhucz

I read this as Queen Elizabeth at first and was like «damn»


Baximuss

Eben Etzebeth is an absolute beast. Massive arms


TrappedInOhio

Dude looks like a GEICO caveman.


icelandiccubicle20

Angus Macaskill- 7 ft 9, 430 lbs


Tinshnipz

The NHL team I cheer for just drafted a 6'8 guy. I think he's around 230lb, can't remember but he's still a teen.


przhelp

Lebron varies from about 250 to 270. He normally leans out in the offseason and between seasons depending on the position he expects to primarily play during that season.


MDTv_Teka

And for the rest of the worlders?


Short_Tailor

What makes it more impressive... rugby! This guy isn't swimming laps or making freethrows, he is smiting equally heavy dudes.


_dictatorish_

For 80 minutes too


GoombaTrooper

Basketball is a lot of running and jumping, not just free throws...?


80H-d

But importantly, basketball typically *isn't* a lot of intentional collision between humans. I hope you get that "fuuuck, that was so obvious, what!" feeling now


TheRealSteemo

Its often hard to realise how big rugby players are. When on TV, there is rarely a "normal" person to compare them to, so they often look normal sized. See them out in public and they are fucking massive. I remember seeing Martin Johnson (World Cup Winning captain for England) in London and he just towered over everyone, absolute man mountain. On the pitch, he looked just above average.


Gorge2012

[Time to throw up my favorite picture of Will Skelton](https://i.imgur.com/P9rH7KS.jpg)


Nothing_is_simple

[This is mine](https://images.app.goo.gl/P4k8X3BJaVzcFzuNA)


Gorge2012

[Reminds me of my favorite Dean Mumm fend](https://youtu.be/BqlQQEh0g5M)


th3whistler

I saw Joe Worsley on the tube back when he was playing and he basically blocked an entire doorway


Gatekeeper2019

Yep, worsley was massive in person. Saw danny grewcock back in the day and that was an intimidating sight to see.


80H-d

Did his name check out when you saw him tho 😳😳😳


FatWeabo

i’m glad to hear danny managed alr


Fanta69Forever

True that! The kiwis played Scotland one autumn when I lived in St Andrews and they stayed in the old course hotel up there. I was out on the way to Tesco and spotted a bunch of them approaching on the other side of the street from some way off, so I crossed quickly and cut a line right through the middle of their group on the footpath. I'm not short but they all towered over me. Absolute giants!


Capital_Metal7077

Was it like the sketch on Father Ted.... 'these people are far away.... But they're massive...'


MrFuckingDinkles

I have a feeling he makes a lot of people look that way


edgpavl

[Not that crazy in real life](https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3302992/I-honestly-didn-t-mean-New-Zealand-man-Phil-Walter-pictured-giant-Sam-Whitelock-towering-Prime-Minister-John-Key-comes-clean-photograph.html)


educated-emu

Ah yeah, he is half standing up from sitting down so there is an optical hobbit illusion


thedudefromsweden

Also the rugby player is closer to the camera.


rumpler117

Definitely some wide angle lens stuff happening there


Ouboet

Yeah. Kieran Reed has long-ass legs, but not 3/4 of his body like on this image.


SpicymeLLoN

>"Sam Whitelock then just walked into the scene to also shake hands with the prime minister. Sam was standing closer to me with Key sitting further away," [photographer Phil Walter] told Daily Mail Australia. >"[Prime Minister John Key] was in the process of getting up while shaking Sam's hand and it's a low ceiling in the changing rooms, so it made him look even smaller again." >The fact he used a 16mm wide lense and took the photograph from that particular angle also made Whitelock look massive compared to Key.


Thanos_Stomps

I could never imagine a former high ranking US politician, let alone the president, chatting it up in the locker room and having a beer with the winning team.


edgpavl

it's not like he just did it because he felt like it, it's a publicity stunt. US politicians would and have done similar things for the tabloids.


SallyPia

I think to a lot of people John Key was viewed like an embarassing uncle that shows up uninvited all the time. Not a bad dude but also no one's fave ya know


neldela_manson

As Jeremy Clarkson once put it: Rugby is like (American) football, only it’s played by men.


icelandiccubicle20

I'd like to see him play one game in the NFL and see if he'd still talk that kind of bollocks, and I'm a rugby fan btw


icelandiccubicle20

that doesn't really make sense, both sports are full of freak athletes imo


Thanos_Stomps

The criticism of American Footballers is that they're not as well rounded athletes but they are nonetheless absolute freaks of nature. The difference is each position has very specific needs and physical niches. People think the O line are just a bunch of tubalards but they're massive, are insanely quick in short bursts, and absolute herculean strength. Conversely, a wide receiver is going to be tall, a slimmer but muscular build, and whose primary strengths are sprint speed, agility, and hand eye coordination. I am not sure which American Football position is most analogous to Rugby, but I am sure that there are plenty of NFL players that could walk on and start for any Rugby team.


_Niel_

The last sentence is comical ……they would be ducks out of water NFL players are tuned for bit parts ….. Rugby is a full game and the players whilst specialists in a position are there for the whole game and take part in every phase of it.


VaultofAss

You were doing so well until the last sentence.


ShadowCaster0476

Look at the size of his shoes.


0thethethe0

>Look at the size of his ~~shoes~~ canoes.


warpswede

That dillweed isn't our current PM. He's a ponytail grabbing dickling of a man.


fuzy22

Better than the authoritarian we have now or the mess that is current national


OCE_Retro

Wow, judging by those downvotes Jacinda still has some supporters! Thought the whole nation hated her guts by now.


sigilnz

Even us national voters know a stupid comment when we see one...


KarlKlebstoff

She is well respected internationally. Did she fuck up? NZ inner matters are rarely reported on here.


warpswede

She isn't perfect, but she's way better than the last few National leaders. Covid made people dislike her even though shit would be the same under any leader, because businesses had to close etc. As if it isn't a worldwide issue. People can't contain their misogyny for long, hence insulting looks as criticism of a polititian.


Luecleste

Aussies would prefer her. That snap four week lockdown was better than what we got.


Saur_Kraut

I don't think so, Auckland has been currently locked down for over 112 days strait and counting.


reclaimernz

That was Aucklanders' own doing, because they couldn't stick to the rules.


Luecleste

Melbourne had the same issue. I’m not in Melbourne. I’m outside it. They were locked down, 5km travel limit, essential travel only… Yet there they were, in Barwon Heads, on the other side of the bay, enjoying their day trips. One woman put pulled over by the cops halfway to Geelong. She wanted to have lunch out and do some shopping… in Torquay. Torquay is on the coast, past Barwon Heads. Like half an hour out from Geelong. Every outbreak in the smaller towns in my area were areas people from me,Bourne would sneak out to. There are selfish cunts everywhere.


Luecleste

Melbourne thinks that’s cute


pounds_not_dollars

We prefer Scott Morrison. Source: last election


Luecleste

Sorry Jacinda wasn’t in our last election. And you know what? I hope he gets voted out in the next election. He’s been a terrible PM.


roidie

The cunt literally went to Hawaii during the country's worst national disaster. The only reason the libs get votes is because most of our media is a propaganda arm for them.


Luecleste

Ding ding ding. And don’t forget he tried to hide having gone to Hawaii while the country burned. And he fucked up the vaccine rollout. Fucked up the aged care, then blamed it all on the states. He’s the literal definition of failing up and I can not stand his smarmy, punchable, face. I just irrationally hate his face. I dread seeing it like I dread cracking every egg in case one’s rotten.


KarlKlebstoff

Ok, if they dislike her for the covid policy, that's pretty ridiculous given the rest of the planet pretty much envied you for it.


ubitstrelka

No no no, they're not disliking the covid policy, they're scapegoating the economic effects of covid onto her management. Kinda like Obama at the start of his term after the GFC.


Latin-Danzig

To be fair “way better than the previous National leaders” isn’t a very high bar to set. A wet sock could’ve put on a better performance.


OCE_Retro

I'm going to respectfully disagree, what about the money she gave to the mongrel mob? Or giving millions in subsidies to destiny church? For the most part she is good but she has her moments of complete fuck ups.


onedarkhorsee

Do you really think that anyone is going to make the correct decision every time?!?


OCE_Retro

Not at all, but how hard is it to NOT give money to a drug trafficking gang?


onedarkhorsee

Sure i was appalled by that decision, but shes made more good ones than bad, you cant have everything is all im saying


OCE_Retro

True.


OCE_Retro

Basically she has started going back on some promises she made when covid wasn't as big a threat like not making vaccine passports. She also has kept one of the major cities in full lockdown for months, people are just tired of it.


Rutabaga1598

Still better than horseface.


warpswede

If your only criticism is her looks, i can't see you having anything important to say. Do you find John Key sexier then bro? He do it for you? Growing a ponytail for him to yank?


ATiredPhilosopher

She's up there as most attractive world leader and more importantly a brilliant leader, just sayin


taversham

Fierce competition from the [Premier of Bermuda](https://caricom.org/caricom-sg-congratulates-re-elected-premier-of-bermuda/) tho.


richmigga_1998

Scotty from marketing [would like to have a word from you](https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9306003/amp/Scott-Morrison-enjoys-Bronte-Beach-family-amid-parliament-sexual-assault-scandals.html)


Minionmemesaregood

Scottys gonna make me act up looking fine as hell


King_of_the_Dot

Get a load of this hot take... *I dont wanna bang her soo....*


TGRMNZ

There’s a goat next to John key aswell


Dunkinmydonuts1

So camera height, telephoto lens, qnd the fact that the PM is 2 or 3 feet behind the player in the background are all causing this to look way worse than it is. Seriously the pic makes the player look like an 8 feet tall UNSC Spartan


Tof12345

Camera angle makes him look 2.5x bigger.


gothlaw

That is inhuman. LOL.


TJHush

Someone has to try and tackle and take the ball off that dude. I know that someone is likely to be 6ft+ and a built like brick shithouse themselves but jesus.


Jupitersdangle

What’s up regular size man


sauce2k6

Did New Zealands Prime Minister get a sex change? Also angle doesn't help, Whitelock is closer to the camera. Still a big boy though


galaxyflight576

no the title is wrong fairly certain that's an e primeminister


Stagmanc34

To be fair John Key is 5'9. Also quite possibly the most widely disliked PM we've ever had, guy is an absolute bellend


cavemanben

I thought that NZ's prime minister was that smug authoritarian cunt?


Dommekarma

This pic is about 6 years old. Also fuck you Jacinda is a treasure.


[deleted]

Jacinda is a dictator. Clearly the wool is sewn over your eyes


EnigmaUnboxed

10,000 cases and 41 deaths during the whole pandemic. The US are still seeing up to 9x the amount of cases PER DAY. You call her a dictator because she had the balls to lock down New Zealand to protect it from this pandemic, which is more than I can say for Scomo across the pond here.


[deleted]

lol alright then


Capital_Metal7077

Username checks out. Prat.


cavemanben

I like that you didn't disprove my claim. Is she not a smug authoritarian cunt? Because she sure acts like one. Maybe all you NZ blokes are into the same fetish? Want to put your peckers behind your legs and be dominated by a "strong independent" woman? Pathetic, the lot of you.


Capital_Metal7077

Have you been googling how to post like an embarrassing incel? Because you are nailing it pal. And I'm not kiwi. I'm from a country that has many, many more deaths than New Zealand and has handled Covid appallingly. Also, working in public health I can appreciate a proper response and an awful one. The UK is the awful one.


Capital_Metal7077

Also what's wrong with a strong independent woman yuh weirdo


starrpamph

Looking more like a choice minister


Cyril_Rioli

Wait until you see a photo of Whitelock next to his wife!


AlertedCoyote

This reminds me of that comic panel with Spiderman hanging off Hulk's arm


AggresiveDuckSlayer

Imagine you're in an ancient battlefield and you see this dude swinging a fucking war axe, just slicing your comrades in half


FriedGhoti

Funny to think that the little dude has more power than all the other dudes in that room.


Barney_Reynolds

*had. He’s a former Prime Minister.


LlamasReddit

Wtf a giant


TheMrBrojangle

Standing closer to the camera and an angled shot helps to exaggerate it as well. No doubt he's bigger, but he's also not the hulk lol.


9inety9ine

Rugby dude is only 2 inches taller than me and I'm no monster. Maybe the PM is actually short? The fact a seated player is nearly shoulder height is what makes me wonder.


Pineapple_and_olives

If you are in fact 6’6” that’s quite a bit above average height. Do you mostly spend your time around other taller than average people?


9inety9ine

He's 2.02m tall, that's slightly over 6ft6. I'm slightly over 6ft4. Edit: I just looked it up, the (ex) PM is 5ft5. My mom would make him look small.


iamnoteueifran

nano prime-minister.


MaybeTrueMaybeNotQT2

We should get this guy and Shaq together in a room so we can all pretend to be elves or dwarves for a bit...


gufete

Space Marine without armor


Jethro00Spy

The PM is tiny, I'm roughly the same height as the big boy, and this looks like my next to my wife who is 5'2".


Von_Lehmann

The all-blacks came to my Uni gym in scotland once and it was just insane seeing people that big up close


Grundlebarmustache

If you ever play against that guy, make sure to wear your brown pants.


Boy_Witch

This looks like the beginning of a gay porn I really would like to see.


intalectoal

At first I read his name as “whittlecock”


VegetableArmy93

He’d make Shaq look tiny!


jerkymcjerkison

Positions of power


runswspoons

He’s so big he made New Zealand’s prime minister look like a man!


BokiGilga

Yeah, also the foot from the player sitting next to him looks perfectly normal.


TurokHunterOfDinos

Fee, fi, foe, fom, I smell the blood of a Politiciun.


hackulator

New Zealand's Prime Minister is a woman and has been for 4 years. This guy doesn't even look like her predecessor. The Rugby player is real big though.


Matches_Malone108

After securing Halo’s Infinite, the Master Chief retired and spent the rest of his years interviewing New Zealand’s Prime Minister, and occasionally played rugby.


Bagsen

[Here](https://www.zimbio.com/photos/John+Key/Sam+Whitelock/zvYbMkOF-Bh/New+Zealand+v+Australia+Final+Rugby+World) is a less distorted angle of the two. Still a big difference but not quite as shocking


littleghool

Excuse me, that's a giant. Thank you.


CanadiangirlEH

Are we sure they didn’t just find Sasquatch and shave him?


WalkingLaserBeam

He reminded me immediately of the big guy from fighting force (ps1)and I have no idea why because I literally haven’t thought of that game in like two decades Someone commented “ I am the brute force “ and I thought it was a reference to that for some reason


TheMostBacon

#TWICKENHAM